Maker Report
Peggy Bundy as a lifestyle, ugly manicures, and my manager's goodies
My trip to visit family in Florida was tough, but, like most things in life, was not devoid of joy. I’ve been fixated the last couple of years on making sure I have enough room inside of me to recognize the sweetness, the peace, the delight that finds me even in the midst of turmoil, so here were some bright spots:
My 6 year old nephew Dash, who is already more brilliant and more hilarious than he was when I saw him ten months ago, dragged me by the hand to his bedroom to show me all the money in his piggy bank. He gleefully told me he had over a hundred dollars saved as we watched the bills float down onto his bedspread, then he placed two $1 bills in my hand and told me I could use them to play videogames at the arcade 🥹 I was never so generous as a kid! I guess the fear of not having enough can erode your magnanimity, especially when you’re young. I’m so happy I grew out of that, and happy that Dash doesn’t have to.
Me, my dad and the boys drove to the bowling alley the next day. During our 45 minute car ride, Levi and Dash insisted that I “make a rap about us”, a so-called “talent” of mine that would not pass muster under any other circumstances, but because my nephews are young and culturally white, I might as well be Trina. They ask me to “rap” about them whenever we spend time together, and they don’t complain that my beats are slow as molasses, observational at best, staid at worst. I can do a whole 16 bars of throaty “uhhhhhhhhs” and “yos” and they just sit there grinning, waiting patiently for my “flow” (lol) to trickle out. I know it is only a matter of time before my brother introduces the boys to Tupac and Biggie and Nas, before their perspective will shift focus away from me and my “skills”, before and I am relegated to full time boring Auntie-dom. But I am not cringe yet! For now, I am still worthy of their admiration and devotion, and I am luxuriating in every single moment.
Later that day at the bowling alley, Levi kept changing my name on the scoreboard to something silly and then I would do it to his name when his back was turned. Apparently young Dash wanted to give it try, too, and when I looked up at the screen next, my scoreboard name said “MIKEL GAXON oooooooooooo”. That’s the kindergarden version of Michael Jackson, oooooow!. It’s been a week since I’ve been home and I’m still chuckling over this.
On my last night in town, when the alcoholic in my life had ticked off most of the things on the Drunken Behavior List I hate the most, I disappeared myself from the party, seeking refuge in any room of the house with a door I could close. Eventually I found myself in my brother and sister-in-law’s playroom, the room with the tv and the video games and the toys and the musical instruments. My Dad was leaned up against the back of the couch, quietly practicing his bass guitar which he always brings to Florida on our family trips. On a whim, I grabbed the first set of drumsticks I saw and sat behind my brother’s drum set, keeping time with my Dad’s rhythm. Within a minute or two we had found a groove and were having a full jam session together, my Dad and I staring at each other with huge smiles on our faces, awe-stricken. We are a musical family that has never made music together- it felt transcendent!
I don’t know how to play the drums, or any instrument aside from a few chords on the guitar, but rhythm has always come easily to me. It’s as if through osmosis, the incessant drumming I watched my dad do growing up- in the car on the steering wheel, on the kitchen counters, on the tops of me and my brother’s legs- seeped itself into my body, same as how watching my mom cut hair for years translated to me being able to confidently cut hair, too. As a kid, I kept imitation at the forefront of my toolbox. I learned to mimic my mom’s emotions to keep us close. I learned to mimic what I learned from white culture so that I could blend in at school. I learned how to mimic artists when I understood that I could use my talent as currency. I became so good at copying in fact, that I auditioned for and got cast in a tapdance musical before casting realized I had no formal dance training (they ultimately made me perform with tapless character shoes, but the audience was none the wiser).
What began as a survival method has become a badge of honor, proof that knowledge can be acquired through many different means, not just through expensive classes taught by professionals. When I was a kid, I was hungrier than any of my peers. I listened to my friends talk about being forced to take piano and gymnastics and ballet and swim lessons and I practically salivated. What I wouldn’t give for something extra-curricular in my life, a container for all my curiosity, some focused attention from an adult who wasn’t required to encourage me, but who was choosing to. Instead I became my own teacher, cultivating a practice of discipline around drawing, reading, singing and writing, quietly studying how people did the things they were good at so I could emulate it. At first it felt like pretending, until I realized that that’s all learning is- pretending you understand how to do something until it’s real. The unfortunate side effect of such a relationship to learning is that you are often left nursing a persistent sense of Imposter’s Syndrome. But there are worse things to combat than occasionally feeling like a fraud. The alternative is not believing that you are capable of anything special at all.
Anyways, one last highlight I will share about my trip was my visit to Artpool, a lovely, well curated vintage clothing store in St. Petersburg, FL. I visited this store for the first time last year and it’s become a must-stop for me. Each visit here I have found unique vintage pieces that I was excited to dismantle and remake in new fabric. My first purchase was a gorgeous, sleek robe made in a thin, cheap polyester. Vintage polyester is my least favorite fabric because it’s an unsustainable textile and not only does it make me sweat, it holds onto the funk of every single body that has ever worn it beforehand, no matter how many vinegar washes you give it. Ew. I remade it in a silk I bought in Paris and it’s now the most lux house garment I have ever worn.
On my most recent trip, I stumbled upon a wrap dress in a lightweight block printed cotton. The style seems to be possibly east asian but decidedly modest, with full coverage down the arms, from the anke up to the neck, but it manages to be sexy, too. What stood out to me about it on the rack was it’s clever closures. It has ties on the insides that hold the wrap together, and two thoughtfully placed buttons that keep the neck closed and the skirt fixed in the front. I love finding pieces like this, design styles that you simply don’t see everyday in RTW, much less in the sewing pattern sphere. My purchase of this dress lead to an exciting project idea that hit me like lightning once I was back home in LA, and I am in the process of fully fleshing the idea out so that I can do something with it. Because I am super a little stitious, I’ll keep the details to myself for now, but if and when I get enough momentum behind me, I’ll be excited to share it here.
Onto the making!
Years ago a company gifted me a “knitters’ backpack” that I absolutely adored and used frequently. It was made of a cool gray faux leather, and it had all these smart pockets and neat needleworking accoutrements designed into the pack, like a keychain hook attached to a piece of leather with 1” measurement markings painted on it, a metal yarn threader that would feed your skein from the pocket and through a hole so the yarn wouldn’t get knotted, and holders for a variety of hooks and needles. The gray wasn’t in my color palette but I didn’t care because I didn’t know about my colors at the time, haha. I’ve brought that bag on virtually every trip I’ve taken for the past 9 or so years. Months ago I realized that the “leather” coating was flaking off the bag unveiling a white, filmy polyester base fabric underneath. It’s unfortunately not fixable, at least not at a reasonable cost, which meant I needed something to replace it.
I immediately knew I wanted to make the Desmond Roll Top BackPack by Taylor Made. I have made this bag twice before as gifts for other people over the years, so I was excited to finally make one for myself. I window shopped my stash and vacillated between a strange but exquisite velvet jaquard-ish animal print (impossible to describe and impossible to deny!) and a thick cotton velvet with a saturated flower print. Both of these would have turned out beautifully in this pattern but ultimately the animal print was calling my name the loudest.
The story behind this animal print fabric is pretty great. When my sewing bestie and fellow Aries Reneé (@missceliespants if you’re nasty) was in town for her birthday a few years ago, we went to Ragfinders, a downtown designer deadstock store loaded (and I mean LOADED) with tens of thousands of pounds of fabric sprawling across several floors. The place is laden with gems but even I, a not-particularly-claustrophobic person, felt the magnitude of how packed the building was and how I was but one earthquake shake away from being crushed by a massive bolt of denim fabric. The price per yard of fabric at Ragfinders is super low, but the catch is that there is a ten yard minimum on all merchandise. I was obsessed with this animal print when I saw it peeking out from the bottom of a mountain of fabric bolts, but could not for the life of me imagine what I would possibly do with 10 yards of it, so I left the store with only a two inch scrap in my pocket to remember it by.
Months later when I still had not gotten the fabric out of my head (my trick for purchases I’m on the fence about: sleep on it for a few days/weeks/months and if it wont leave you alone, go back and get it), I went back to Ragfinders, certain that the fabric would no longer be there but hopeful nevertheless. It took some time for an employee to hunt it down (how they manage to find anything in that packed store I will never know!) but eventually they did. Over the next week I posted my find in IG stories explaining that I couldn’t possibly keep it all, and I managed to sell the bulk of it to other IG users in packages of one or two yards. I kept a couple yards for myself and made a Heather Blazer out of it a few years ago but still had a nice chunk of yardage left to make a bag (or two) with. I’m not sure what this fabric was initially intended for but it has a backing which makes me think upholstery or bags/accessories. My blazer is a great pair for this fabric but because the backing makes the fabric very stiff, it’s less appropriate for clothing that needs a bit of drape, like a dress or pants. It works so well as a backpack that at some point I might make myself a little matching weekender bag to go with it.
The backpack is pretty straightforward with interesting construction, and it’s a delight to see it all come together. I took liberties with the pocket placement in the lining, adding an extra pocket to keep my ipad or laptop leaned against the back of the bag and adding a snap so that pocket can be closed when my big items are not in towe. I used wider webbing than the pattern called for cause that’s what I had in my stash and only had to make minor adjustments for everything to fit together around it.
I do recall from using one of the rolltop bags I made for someone else that if the bag was filled up to the brim, the roll would come undone a bit and make it possible for things to fall out. I contemplated putting a zipper at the top of the bag, which would be a functional fix, but ultimately decided to add a couple snaps on either side of the bag instead- I think I might add one more to the middle for safety’s sake.
I had a nice leather in my stash that looked great with the animal print so I decided to incorporate it in just a couple places- the side pocket and the back strap cover. Speaking of, the leather is doubled over in this area which made it difficult for my machine to sew on top of the straps and webbing, so I had to come up with a clever way to hide the extra lines of stitches you are instructed to sew to make sure the straps are solidly held in place. Fortunately my twill tape label matches the color and vibe of the bag and hides the messy lines of stitching underneath it.
I finished this bag just in time for a cute little day trip to Santa Barbara by train this past weekend. I wish I had taken a picture of it while I was on the beach, but I was too blissed out so you’ll have to trust me that it looked terrific sunbathing by the ocean.
NailTalk: I had a weird/sad day yesterday and I think it came out in my weekly manicure! I started three different sets of nails but none of them were the right vibe and I was removing the polish on each set by the time I was nearly halfway through. Very rare for me- I’ve missed the mark before, but usually just once, not THREE times!
I initially wanted to try a new technique but I didnt have the right kind of nail tape and they came out looking gross. So then I tried something else, but didn’t have a clear vision of what I wanted and the colors looked wrong together. I didn’t even take a photo of the worst set, which had my nails looking like a zombie’s because of the weird green and gray colors I used. Anyways, here is where I landed- a repeat of a past nail, so a bit uninspired, but at least I got them done. There is no lesson to learn here. Sometimes sadness seeps into the crevices of the things you are doing to combat the blues in the first place. No way around it, may as well welcome the weather in.
Lastly, my manager, who I have been with for over twenty years (!!!!) had a birthday recently. He’s been thinking about opening a bakery, and I was so inspired both by his idea and how great he would be at it that I couldn’t get it out of my mind. I drew this image for him as a bday present (while I was on the aforementioned train, actually!) to offer some love and encouragement to keep following his dreams, since he’s been playing that role in my life for two decades now. Happy birthday, John!
BTW he never shared a name for his potential bakery, I just needed one for the image and “John’s Goodies” is hilarious, haha.
Thanks for reading, y’all! Happy making!
That video of you drumming with your dad is the sweetest thing I've ever seen!!!
I'm absolutely in love with the citrus nail combo color! How does it feel to be gods favorite and be good at everything?!!! 💕